Ah, a peek of sun in London! A sense of dread floods the commuter as he realises the consequence: an exceptionally uncomfortable tube journey ahead. Sweaty bodies pressed together in over-stuffed carriages, desperately attempting to get in for nine o’clock; a hot haze fills the small gaps of stagnant air, and the result of someone’s forgetting to put on deodorant begins to test the nostrils.
Oh, commuter! While it comes with its fair share of issues, the sunshine has the potential to bring all sorts of grace into your life! Think, for a moment, about those sultry sunshine fingers teasing the temptation of the vain and of the beautiful. The heat is an opportunity to naturally top up that St Tropez tan: out creep the strappy dresses, the smooth bare legs. The hair is swept up to expose long necks and jutting clavicals, begging for attention. Breasts in ill-fitting bras wobble as the train jerks to one side or grinds to a begrudged halt as it pulls into the station.
And ladies, the chances are there for you too. The gents choose this time to wear the T-shirts they washed at ninety-degrees; in preparation for their topless moments, the muscles are pumped, toned, edging out of fraying sleeves. Flex after flex, those biceps tighten as the train changes speed: I often watch them clench and wish to bite the tender flesh as it oozes from the edge of the material.
The sunshine commute shouldn’t just be about sticky skin and Boris’ attempts to make us a closer city community. The heat brings out the subtle features we love, and the tube is the greatest way to watch those features in action. Sometimes, you have to bite down the surging bile when you get to an overcrowded platform: see this journey as a way to enjoy the nicest body parts of the sex you are attracted to. And feel free to compliment, or at least smile acknowledgingly. There is nothing to be ashamed about in admiring someone – people dress for attention. You’d be surprised how you can make someone’s day with a nod of appreciation...
- Ann Observer
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